Going to St. Gianna with a special intention

This novena is being posted around the Catholic blogosphere but I'm posting it again here just in case anyone hasn't seen it. The novena begins today and ends on her feast day next Wednesday April 28. There is a brief bio here if you are unfamiliar with her story, but in short, she was a wife and mother who made a heroic decision to save the life of her unborn child and died as a result of complications following the delivery of that child in 1962. She was canonized by JPII in 2004 and is the patron saint of mothers, physicians and unborn children. She is a tremendous saint for our day, not only because of her pro-life example but also because she was a wife and mother who knew intimately the joys and sorrow of the vocation of marriage and everyday family life.

This year I have a particularly special intention for which I am praying for St. Gianna's intercession...

This past year I have endured a bit of a different heart ache in that Mr. Mike and I have been a bit at odds when discussing a third adoption. In short, he is "at peace" with where our little family is and has not felt inclined to pursue another adoption. We've attended various adoption meetings of late, and while he would welcome and be overjoyed if another child somehow fell into our laps, he just didn't feel called to actively pursue another adoption.

This has been a very hard pill for me to swallow. One involving the exercise of yet more humility and patience--two virtues of which I'm apparently very much in need. I have long felt that our family is not yet complete and that someone (or someONES) is missing from our family table. But I have learned, by trial and error throughout the last 11 years of marriage, to trust my husband--unconditionally--as head of our family. My feminist sisters would recoil at this, but I firmly believe that husbands (when prayerfully open to the promptings of the Holy Spirit) are better equipped to lead a family than are wives. I believe God created men and women differently and intentionally this way. As women, we tend to think with our hearts and are guided heavily by emotions and men for their part are blessed to be able to judge things perhaps better with their heads and not get bogged down with the minutiae of peripheral details and matters of the heart.

(Though I do think that often, the promptings of a woman's heart can be used to help gently lead the husband...it's the whole complimentary nature of the relationship of man and woman...but I digress...)

In any case, I've been long struggling with trying to give this over to God. Trusting my husband on this one has been unusually difficult for me.

Low and behold, the Friday after Easter, we began discussing it again and this time...wonder of wonders, Mr. Mike agreed that perhaps the thing to do is to get a homestudy and "leave the rest up to the Holy Spirit".

gulp.

For real?

Be still my heart.

At first I thought this might be a bit of a foolhardy move since we hadn't even made a decision about international vs. domestic adoption vs. foster care--and the homestudy requirements for each are a bit from one another. But who am I to rock the boat? So I made the decision not to over-think it too much, surrendered this concern and sent away for a (domestic) homestudy packet the same day.

Wouldn't you know it? Two days later (Divine Mercy Sunday) I get an email from a friend who knows of an out-of-state adoption situation of a birthmother who is looking for a Catholic couple for her baby due this summer.

Emails are exchanged back and forth.

Emotions are high.

A rollercoaster of events ensue. Another family has been found. That family backs out. Can we get a homestudy done in time?

(did I mention emotions are high?)

Then on Friday afternoon of this past week, I answer the phone and find myself speaking with the priest who is counseling the girl. He assures me that the baby is in fact still available for adoption and it appears that she is committed to an adoption plan. We seem to fit the bill for what she is looking for and it would appear that we are the only couple that is showing interest.

(blink, blink)

You must know that these kind of things don't just happen to Mr. Mike and I. I can count on two hands the number of such "opportunities" that have presented themselves to us over the years but have fizzled out for one reason or another. It's taking every bit of my willpower to not adopt (ha!) a "glass-is-half-empty" attitude. Forgive me, but I'm melancholic by nature.

I am guarded but cautiously optimistic. The documents for the homestudy are halfway filled out/assembled and we have contacted an adoption attorney. We are awaiting word (and I'm literally refreshing my email account every few minutes) to hear if/when she'd like to meet us and move forward.